Language Learning Log — 23rd January

Hello, hello~

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So at almost 3.30a.m last night, I finally finished reviewing some level 2 of TTMIK lessons. (I know I should be sleeping, but my cat woke me up and I couldn’t go back to sleep so haha.) I still have some reviews to go, and I’m actually embarrassed to say that I… forgot most of what I’ve learnt back then, so it’s like I’m really re-learning everything. Gosh.

I’ve never said much about this before, and I’m not sure if you guys remember, but back then I said I went for an exchange student programmer interview, right? While being interviewed, I told the interviewers that I’m self-studying languages. Who would expect that they would actually ask me to introduce myself… oh my god.

I told them that I’m more to reading and writing rather than speaking, but they insisted on it… So I said the basic “annyeong haseyo” and then “nadia imnida” then I stuttered. As to not make me anymore nervous than I already am, they proceeded with my interview without asking more. My brain wasn’t cooperating that time because I was nervous, yes, and I keep wanting to speak Japanese even though I was speaking Korean. I keep mixing them up in my head asfjkasf anddd I feel so so so embarrassed at myself. I claimed myself to be self-studying languages yet I can’t even make a proper self-introduction? Oh my god.

I kinda cursed myself at that time because TTMIK has covered the introduction part and I have actually learned it earlier, so I know it’s somewhere there in my brain… but it just didn’t come out. Gosh. I failed the interview anyway because I didn’t brought any certificates with me orz but lesson learned. This time I got the introductions down for both Korean and Japanese, needs some more pronunciation practice then I’m all set. That was my first interview ever for anything, so I guess it taught me a lot, at least. Next time I’m applying for a university and I’ll have to go for an interview again, so that’s a chance to redeem myself, hopefully.

As for Japanese, I bought myself a Japanese grammar textbook, like finally, yeay! I’m already a few chapters in and I’m soooo in love. The textbook is in my native language, so it’s easier to absorb knowledge this way haha because Malay has some similarities with Japanese.  I also like the way things are explained in the book plus there’s some exercises as well! I think the money spent was really worth it. A bit of a bummer is, it’s full of just… romanized words. So yeah, no kanji, not even kanas in it. So when I make notes, I always make sure to put at least the hiragana words and then put the kanji for the vocabs I learn in my Houhou deck.

What’s Houhou? It’s similar to Anki but it’s hella neat because it has this search feature so you search for the kanji/vocab, then you can add it to your deck and practice like you’re practicing in WaniKani!  I’ll make a post on that haha don’t worry.

The Japanese grammar textbooks I found (like Genki, Japanese for Busy People)… they just  don’t click well with my soul, you know? And yes, I really can’t handle Genki. Not my thing  because it keeps making me sleepy. The new Japanese grammar textbook I bought, though, ahh I  feel happy because it’s like really laid-back but also like a class-setting. I’d say, if you want  to search for a good textbook, search for one that’s in your native language. You’ll understand  it twice as fast, but you’ll have to alter the ways you write your notes, etc. As for me, now, my head translates both in English and Malay when I read some Japanese orz I don’t even know how to fix this. The downside of a textbook in your native language is that you’ll get confused a bit, but I’m sure if you’re a fast-learner then you’re gonna be fine~

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One problem I have with learning languages is that I’m really just good at reading. My speaking sucks and I can’t even make my own sentences ahhh I need more practice and I just signed up for HelloTalk the other day, but I freaked out and uninstalled the app instead. Ahh ;;; My writing is funny too like uhh I have to write a few times to get the wordings right. Why am I so… T_T

I’m kinda scared. I still have a lot to learn and it feels like I’m so far from achieving my goals, it’s getting scary even. :c

Welp. Hopefully things will get better, and all I have to do is study more and more. May everything goes well for me from here on, haha.

Sorry that this turned out to be a veryyyy long post. Thank you so much for reading and have a good weekend ahead! See ya~

Language Learning Log – 4th January

Hello, hello.

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Hope it’s not too late to wish you guys a very Happy New Year! I didn’t get to post on the 1st of January, but anyway, I hope this year will be a wonderful and great year for all of us! Things don’t get easier, but I’m sure you’ll get stronger!

Also, I know, don’t say it. It’s been a very long while since my last ‘language learning log’, haha…. oh my god. I just started focusing more on learning languages now that I have the time, and I’m feeling happier than ever!

So, things done today:

  • Unlocked level 2 of WaniKani’s radicals and kanji!
  • 11-days streak for TTMIK Vocab on Memrise~
  • Finally started learning Korean numbers. (I know, don’t tell me.)
  • Translated level 1 dialogue script of TTMIK with 95% correct translations! Ahhh ❤

In case you can’t tell, yes, I’m very happy! It’s been such a productive day for language learning for me. Unfortunately I didn’t have the time to squeeze in some editing or script-editing for my projects, but I’ll probably be starting on them after this.

Being able to translate a whole dialogue (tran)script made me very, very happy, I tell you. It’s like a dream come true! I know, I’m not like 100% correct but this is like one hell of a milestone for me. Road to being a translator, I’m on my way! It’s very nice how I could actually see my progress now after studying a lot and never knew whether I actually got better at the language or not. Hehe.

I just knew that I actually skipped a few lessons on level 2 and didn’t notice it, plus I forgot most of what I’ve learned after level 1. I checked for notes on my Korean Notebook and was kinda… annoyed at my past self. I didn’t bother to copy the notes from my worn, old and finished notebook back then when I changed to a new one, and now I don’t have notes to look over. So it’s like I’m reviewing, when I actually I have to re-study the whole 20+ lessons. On the bright side, this is a good opportunity to strengthen my memories. So I guess it wasn’t so bad, ayy?

Also, friendly reminder (to myself) that you should never, ever skip the lessons on numbers in any language. I’ve read somewhere back then, that, “you’ll think that you’ll come back later to actually learn the material, when in truth, you never do”. That’s what happened to me, no kidding. If I knew the numbers, I would have been able to translate the script up to, like, 98%. Hahaha.

I guess that’s all, for now. I’ll try to keep this momentum for days to come, and hopefully this’ll go on for a long time! I’m trying to get language-learning as a daily habit, alongside finishing my tasks for projects. Been looking for the perfect app to plan my time but I guess nothing works. I’ve tried from habitbull to Forest app, nothing works. So if you have any recommendations, please do tell me! I’d like something that’s like Habitica, in which you can have a habit list so you can check it off everyday, and at the same time have a to-do list for other tasks due on the same day. Habitica sucks for me because I don’t like the interface, whoops. Picky Nadia is picky, yall.

So for now, I’ll stick to writing my plans on my (soon to be trashed) bullet journal. I need a new notebook though, that just have the perfect thickness with the perfect vintage patterns or style that suits my inner soul. Went to some bookstores with my boyfriend yesterday and didn’t end up buying any notebook as I planned, but I was grateful that he never complained how long I took to pick something out. He did ask “what kind of book actually suit your tastes?” but he never mentioned that he’s bored or anything. Sobs, I’m so thankful. Also by the end of the day we went to an arcade and had a duel on car-racing, and it was my first time playing it too. Guess who won? Me, of course. Haha. //insert a proud meme face here//

But I’m going to go watch Yowamushi Pedal the Movie this Thursday, and there’s a Daiso store nearby the cinemas so hopefully I’ll be able to find something there! Good luck to me, haha!

Gosh, this was supposed to be a language learning log and then it changed halfway, haha.

Thank you very much for reading, and see you guys in the next post! Have a wonderful week ahead, as wonderful as you are! ❤ Byeom~

 

My First Working Experience

Hello, everyone! I’m sure you’ve been seeing a lot of my posts these past few days, haha. This just shows how much I’ve always wanted to just blog about everything, but time constraints and whatnot. But now I have the time so… why the hell not post my thoughts and rants? Haha.

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This is a little throwback from me, to end this year well. Hopefully it’ll bring all of the bad memories along with it, hehe. Ah, right, gotta tell you that this is a very long post, so… enjoy! x3

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The ‘Right’ One.

Hello~ This was typed some time ago in… I don’t remember, but a few months back. Anyway, this is a scheduled post so enjoy!

So today I went over my Korean notes, and thought to myself, that despite all of the pdf files and textbooks I have (in pdf form, of course…), I only use two resources. I only stick to two. TWO, out of my 90+mb loot of language resources.

I basically only use TTMIK and Monash U’s pdf files. (Both can be downloaded legally on their respective sites, anyway).  Aha.

And as for Japanese… Genki don’t actually work for me. Despite the huge positive feedback I read here and there about it, it still doesn’t click well with what’s inside me, haha. I get sleepy, and I can’t focus… and overall, I can’t absorb it. The only Japanese resource I use that could work like 60% and don’t make me sleepy (not for long, though) is Tae Kim’s guide.

I don’t know. Textbook bores me out, if it’s written in plain language. I feel like a freaking book is talking to me instead of feeling like someone is teaching me.

What I like about TTMIK is, yes, you feel like someone is teaching you the material. Tae Kim’s is close enough but it’s a bit too formal for me, as well.

That’s why I told myself that I may be able to accomplish Korean on self-studying with the resources I have, but for Japanese, unless I stop getting sleepy and can stop relying on fast connection to choose which youtube videos can teach me, then I’ll actually have to take a class on Japanese.

I’m a pretty picky person, you see. I’ll admit that.

But my point here is, not everyone is the same.

Things that work for you won’t always work for me, and vice versa. I always do odd things anyway, haha. (Also… I don’t like stereotypes and people stereotyping people. Everyone is different, don’t you think?).

I mean, we are all unique. So what’s suitable for someone else won’t actually suit your tastes, aight? That’s why I don’t actually read reviews unless it is very interesting, because I’m the type who’d like to try things myself. So remember, find what’s right for you, without forcing yourself to do the things that doesn’t click well with your soul.

And thank God I haven’t wasted money on buying any textbooks…….. yet.

I’m interested with the Japanese From Zero! books though. I love how they taught you in those conversational style, as observed in Korean From Zero!, though. Huhu. (Yes, I have my inner child with me whenever I go.)

So just be you, and choose things that fit your tastes, without having to please anyone or comparing yourself to anyone. Do everything, for yourself. Okay?

That’s all, haha. This is what you get when you type things out of the blue in the middle of the night, haha. Thanks for reading, byeom. xD

My First Job, officially.

Hello, hello.

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It’s been a while and I miss everything and all of you! School’s over already and wow I just cannot believe how free I felt when the thought of “I have officially finished high school” sank really deep into my head and heart and I was like, “oh mY GOD, YES, FINALLY FREE!!!”.

Anyway, two days after my last exam paper, I started working. And welp, it was…full of experience, I could say. It was easy yet hard, fulfilling yet empty, and in the end it leaves me feeling torturous inside; it got me depressed all over again, crying every night while I’m talking on the phone with my boyfriend. I seek advices from some close friends and well, most of them told me to hold on. I held on, for as long as I could, but in the end I felt so…. much agony. I think, somehow, the job just doesn’t fit well with my soul. I’m not sure how to explain but it kills me inside.

So I decided to (wo)man up and decided for myself that I wanna quit, because there are some people that understands my situation, thank goodness. I thought, this is not the shit I wanna do for the rest of my days where I could have done better, this is not how I want my life to be, and this is basically not a job that I was expecting to be in. True, I have a nice and easy job at a book store, in the office at that, plus I don’t work with a lot of people (as I’m an extreme introvert and have some anxiety when it comes to meeting people) and I also don’t work shift hours; I work office hours, which means I got in at morning,  got out at noon. That’s why people said that I haven’t been grateful. But blergh, I just can’t do it. Astaghfirullah.

It took a few silence and cold-shoulders for me to deal with the people around me, announcing that I’m quitting, both to family, friends and colleagues. A few conflicts here and there and finally, tomorrow is my last day of work. Allahu. I’m both scared and excited; what if something scary happens when I quit? Will they find out why I quit and hate me? I’m excited to be free from these chains and to finally do the thing I want, the thing my heart has been screaming for ages to do; to follow my passion without time constraints.

I’m a bit scared about how people would look at me once I step out of work tomorrow, but I’m sure the experiences I had and will have, will contribute towards becoming  a better me myself, since I do have some wonderful seniors here and there. I love them, hehe. I love the job, but my soul is just not there… you know? I’m not sure if other people understands, but I do have a friend or two that quit in the past few weeks from their jobs as well, for the same reason: the job just doesn’t ‘click’ well with their souls.

Anyway, good luck to me. Haha. I’ll have some posts queued up for this week, since I have many things to write about. I’ve said this pretty much a thousand times now lol haha.

Also, as for my language learning, since I changed my phone, I think both my Korean and Japanese have improved a bit, but there’s much more progress than before yeay. I started using HelloTalk as well, but I’m just so…. scared, and I barely talk to people hahaha oh my god.

Here goes nothing; for tomorrow. Happy holidays, people, and I hope everyone’s enjoying their break! Have a great week ahead and thank you so much for reading! ❤

Final Countdown

Hello everyone.

This is just a short update to tell you that my awaited national exams are fast approaching.
Only a week left, more or less. And am I prepared? I feel kinda so-so.

Honestly, I have so many plans and things to do after these exams are over. Language-learning, movie and anime binge-watching, crafting, journalling, writing, sleeping, and everythinggggg that I used to love doing, I’d like to do them when I have the free time after my exams ended. Also, get a part-time job so that I won’t burden my parents that much anymore, haha.

But ahhhh it’s almost a torture to wait. And it kinda scares me that I’m not nervous at all…. maybe not yet. I totally, totally want to do well in these exams because this is the last exam I’ll ever have in high school, and after the exams end I will probably be free of school and science and oh my god.

I’m gonna do my best. I’ll study smart, do what I can do, and just…. do it!
I mean, I’ve waited years for this, cried rivers of tears, stayed up too many nights and just, well, put myself on danger when going to and fro from school. Gah, let’s do this!!

I want to make my parents proud, my brothers smiling from ear to ear to have a sister like me, my boyfriend sharing all the happiness because his efforts of teaching me don’t go to waste and most of all, I’m gonna make my own self proud. Proud for going this far, proud for fighting through the challenges, and proud for going through every little shit and every little piece of rainbows till the very end.

This is it. Let’s do this.

Good luck to you, Nadia! Let’s show ’em what you can do! Hyaaaaah!

Thank you for reading and see you guys after my exams finish (my last paper is ICT, an elective subject, which has a 7-days gap from the last paper for my science stream) on the 7th of December. Until then guys, may good things happen to you all and keep on fighting till the end, you got this!!! ❤